Fixing It
by DiM writer
Summary: Rory misses Jess. She cancels the Europe trip so she can fix it all with him. Jess misses Rory. He leaves her something so she'll know the truth.
1. Missing You Already

(A/N) this is my first Gilmore Girls fic so I hope you like!! I don't own the characters the 2 show creators do. This picks up the day after 'Those are Strings Pinocchio'.  
  
Chapter 1: Missing You Already  
  
"Mom!" Rory screamed up the stairs.  
  
"What!?" Lorelai yelled back down in an exasperated tone.  
  
"I have a few things to do before we leave. Flight leaves at 6 right? So we have to be at the airport at 4." Rory checked her watch. It was 9:42 AM. "So since I was smart and had everything packed already, I'm going to run a few errands."  
  
"You don't want to stay and help mama pack?" Lorelai suddenly appeared at the top of the stairs. Her bottom lip was stuck out and she looked at her daughter with pleading eyes. Rory just laughed and shook her head.  
  
"Stop that you. I'll be back in a few hours and I'll help you pack then." She said as she clutched the doorknob. Her mom nodded and sarcastically muttered something under her breath about the 'help these days' and trudged back to her room.  
  
So Rory opened the door and stepped out into the small town that was Stars Hollow. She gazed around her and realized she wouldn't be seeing this place again for half of the summer. She felt a little upset but realized she needed to get away more than anything. She started to walk down Peach, headed towards Lanes house. She would say goodbye to her first and then maybe again later.  
  
But when she arrived, no one was home at the Kim house. So instead, she decided she should visit Doose's and get some food for the trip and the long wait at the airport.  
  
She entered the doors and a bell jangled. 'Some things never change' she thought. As she was perusing the snack isle Taylor ambushed her.  
  
"Rory, how are you dear?" She turned around and plastered on a big fake smile.  
  
"I'm doing alright Taylor, how about you?" He studied her carefully for a moment and cautiously said,  
  
"You know Rory, I've heard a couple things around town the last day or two. are you sure you're alright?"  
  
'So people are already talking.' She thought to herself. She wanted to keep up a brave face but Taylor even insinuating something like that made her want to break down. She managed finally to sputter out "I'm. yea Taylor I'm ok."  
  
Taylor didn't want to press the issue further but said, "Ok. Well Rory since we wont see you for a while how about when you finish, it's on the house."  
  
She smiled and was grateful he didn't want any more information. "Thank you so much Taylor."  
  
"No problem." Rory finished up her grocery shopping and left after thanking Taylor again. As she continued walking down the street, she passed Luke's. She would have to go in eventually, she couldn't leave without saying goodbye to him. But going in there. well she wasn't sure how she would take it.  
  
She went a few other places, the bookstore, Mrs. Patty's, and the Kim's again (still no answer). She got a new book called, "The Lovely Bones" by Alice Sebold. It wasn't really her style of book but she would give anything a try. Mrs. Patty knew all about Jess leaving and was apparently the one who had told the whole town in the first place, but Rory had expected that. But what Rory hadn't expected was the vacancy of the Kim home. She only had about 2 hours left before she had to be home and she would be devastated if she couldn't even say goodbye to her best friend.  
  
So then, after visiting almost everywhere in town, Rory had only two people to say goodbye to. Lane and Luke. Throwing caution into the wind she made her way across the park to Luke's diner. When she opened this door, it to had a jingling bell. She slowly walked up to the counter and set her things down on the floor. Luke came out from the kitchens and his eyes lit up. Over the years he had become like a father to her.  
  
"Rory! I'm glad you came by before you guys left. You know, with you two gone, I'm going to have a coffee surplus."  
  
"Not if I drink it all before we leave anyway!" Rory joked. Luke poured her a mug of coffee and she gulped it down as if she hadn't eaten in days. Luke shook his head,  
  
"That really isn't good for you. Shouldn't you be drinking I dunno, milk or something?"  
  
"Now Luke, if I were to drink milk, I would be ten feet tall. All this coffee has kept me from reaching my true height. If I were to say. quit drinking coffee, I would grow at an incredible rate. And we don't want that now do we?" Rory said trying not to laugh at the expression on Luke's face.  
  
"You get more and more like your mother every day." Luke said still shaking his head. "I never know when to believe the two of you."  
  
"Thank you Luke. That, in my opinion, is the highest praise you could offer me." She said.  
  
"Your welcome then." He smiled.  
  
Rory drank 3 more cups of coffee and Luke went about his business. He finally came back over and was talking to Rory when the conversation drifted somehow to Jess.  
  
"You know, it's not your fault he left." Luke said to her.  
  
"I know. But it's not yours either." Luke didn't know what to say to that.  
  
"Sometimes I think it is. Like maybe I could have helped him out more. I could have been more supportive of him." He looked very sad.  
  
"You did so much for him Luke. Don't ever doubt that. He appreciated you Luke. He may not have ever come out and said it, but I could tell." Rory told him, his face softened.  
  
"I'm sorry he left." He said that really to comfort them both.  
  
"I miss him." She finally admitted. "I really did love him."  
  
"I know Rory. And he knew too. He just had a decision to make. And he made the wrong one." Rory nodded.  
  
"Did he leave anything?" She asked.  
  
"Not much but you can go look if you want." He said.  
  
"Thank you." She got up and headed towards the stairs. She completely forgot about everything she had bought but felt confident it would still be there when she came back down. Just before she went up the stairs she turned back. "Luke?"  
  
He turned around just in time to see her wrap her arms around him. He hugged her back after a moment and as she pulled away she again said, "Thank you."  
  
He nodded and she began to climb to stairs to confront her demons. She pushed open the door and saw the room. Luke's room was full of stuff, and so was the kitchen. But when she reached Jess' side of the room it was barren. He had left a few books. Rory recognized them as hers. She pulled one out and flipped through the pages. He had made a few notes in the columns, no doubt of things to ask Rory later. She ran her finger along his messy handwriting. She could feel the tears welling up already. She gazed around the room and finally let the tears spill.  
  
She pulled out all of her books, 5 in total, and looked at what he had written. Then she saw that there was another smaller book that had been hidden behind those books. She pulled it out and carefully opened it to the middle of the book. It read,  
  
'May 18, 2003- Today I almost screwed up everything with Rory. I lied to her because I felt like an idiot. I mean, what kind of pansy gets beaked in the eye by a swan!? So I finally told her it was a football. She believed me. I felt so guilty but I couldn't bring myself to tell her I had lied. Why do I always screw things up? Sometimes I can't even talk around her. She's just so. perfect.'  
  
She ran her finger along that messy handwriting of his. She flipped a couple more pages.  
  
'June 1, 2003-  
  
Rory is going to Yale! Which means she won't be far away. I was so worried that she would choose somewhere like Rice and be a million miles away. But I'll still be in here in grand ole Stars Hollow. My grades have dropped so much; I couldn't go to college if I wanted to. Rory doesn't know. Just more lying for the screw up Jess.'  
  
Rory was crying quite freely now, but remained silent. She read only one more page.  
  
'June 14, 2003-  
  
Well this is it. She'll never take me back now. We didn't officially break up but I know its coming. We were at a party. We watched Lanes band. I wanted to leave, I hate parties like that. Sure the band was good and all but I just don't fit in there. So instead of leaving, I went and found a quieter room. Somewhere I could think. I still hadn't told Rory I'm not graduating. I had to know what I was going to say. She wouldn't be mad, just disappointed, and that's ten times worse. But when she came up I lost control. She looked so beautiful and I just wanted to hold her forever. I wanted her so bad. I knew I should be doing it and I knew it would cause some serious repercussions but I did it anyway. And then when she told me to stop I didn't. I wanted to make her feel good, because every time I see her I feel very good. But instead of keeping a cool head I yelled at her. She started crying, she didn't hear me yell out to her. God, I screwed up so bad. I got jealous, she ran to Dean. So I punched him again and again. I wanted to prove to her I was better, that I could be as good as him. But instead, I just screwed things up even worse. I think I've lost the best thing that ever happened to me.'  
  
She dropped the journal and crawled up onto his old bed. It still smelled like him. She grabbed the pillow and cried herself to sleep.  
  
******************************************  
  
"She came up here close to an hour ago and she hasn't come down since." Luke said as he pushed open the door to his apartment. Lorelai stepped inside and saw Rory on Jess' bed, curled up in a little ball. She walked over quietly and brushed the hair out of her daughters face. Rory's face was red and tearstained. Lorelai also saw a book on the floor, she bent down and read the page it was open to.  
  
'June 20, 2003-  
  
Rory, I don't know if you'll ever read this. I left it here with your books. I know you could probably never forgive me but I wanted you to know why I did everything I did. I hadn't originally intended to give this to you. It was just a way to get everything out for me. But then I realized you deserve to know the truth. I don't know if I will ever see you again, I don't know that you would ever want to see me. But today I left. I'm headed to Venice Beach, California, to be with my dad. So before I leave, I want you to know, I Love You. I don't know if I ever really told you that before but I do. I Love You. Love, Jess.'  
  
"Luke, come here." Lorelai said, holding out the book. Luke took it and read it. He flipped through it a little and saw that it was filled with diary entries, all written by Jess.  
  
While Luke was still inspecting the journal, Lorelai went to wake up Rory.  
  
"Mom? What." Rory sat up and it all came back to her.  
  
"Honey, did you read that?"  
  
"Some of it. I. I couldn't read it all." She said.  
  
"I think that you could save yourself some heartache if you read the last page." Lorelai grabbed the book from Luke's hands and gave it to Rory. Rory flipped it to the last page and began to read. A single tear fell down her cheek. When she finished she closed the book and hugged it close to her.  
  
She stood up and began to walk quickly down the stairs. She got to the counter and started rummaging through her stuff she had left down there earlier. She finally found her cell phone and dialed information.  
  
"For what city please?" The recording asked.  
  
"Venice Beach, California" Rory said shakily.  
  
"For what listing please?"  
  
"Jimmy Mariano."  
  
"One moment please, I'll connect you." Rory's heart was beating a thousand times a minute. After just a few seconds a woman answered the phone.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Um, hi. I'm looking for Jess." Rory didn't know what else she could say.  
  
"OK, one second I think he's in the library, let me get him."  
  
"Thank you." Rory said. The tension she felt was pounding in her head. Finally she heard his voice on the other end.  
  
"Hello?" Jess asked.  
  
"Hi." Rory said.  
  
"Rory! Is that you?" He asked excitedly.  
  
"Yea it's me." She said.  
  
"Rory, I thought you'd never want to speak to me again, I'm so sorry." Jess said.  
  
"Was it true?" She asked plainly.  
  
"Was what true?" He asked.  
  
"What you wrote, on the last page." She could hear the tears in her voice.  
  
"Yes. Every word of it." He said genuinely.  
  
"Good." She said as she hung up.  
  
"I love you Rory." Jess said. But all he heard was a dial tone.  
  
******************************************  
  
(A/N) OK hope you liked it. Whats gonna happen next!?! Heehee only one person knows!! So review plz!! And next chapter coming soon. 


	2. Finally Found and Can I Get a Towel?

(A/N) Hey here's ch.2 hope you like. I don't own characters. blah blah blah!  
  
****************************************** Last time:  
  
"Was it true?" She asked plainly.  
  
"Was what true?" He asked.  
  
"What you wrote, on the last page." She could hear the tears in her voice.  
  
"Yes. Every word of it." He said genuinely.  
  
"Good." She said as she hung up.  
  
"I love you Rory." Jess said. But all he heard was a dial tone.  
  
******************************************  
  
Chapter 2: Finally Found and Can I get a Towel?  
  
Jess hung up the phone. Why had she hung up? Why had she called? He didn't know what to think at this point. He wanted to call her back but knew he probably shouldn't. But he had to. He had to tell her. He picked up the phone and dialed her cell phone. She didn't pick up. He decided he would just leave a message.  
  
"Hey this is Rory, leave me a message and I'll call you back!"  
  
-BEEP-  
  
"Rory. It's Jess. Um, you hung up before I had a chance to say this. I know I wrote it, and I meant it. But it's not the same. I really don't know if you feel the same way, you'd have every right to hate me. But I guess all I'm really trying to say is I Love You. I'm glad you called earlier, just hearing your voice. I miss you. Ok well the number here is 632-345-0369. I love you so much Rory. I'm sorry I screwed things up. Ok. I guess that's it. So goodbye."  
  
He hung up the phone, the itching feeling that maybe, just maybe, she would take him back was making him feel better already.  
  
******************************************  
  
"Rory, what about Europe? Our flight leaves in less than 2 hours!" Lorelai pleaded.  
  
"Mom, I have to fix this. If you for some reason want to go without me, then go ahead, I wont hold it against you. But I have to go. Mom, I love him. I don't want to lose him for good." Rory said.  
  
"Hon, you don't know anything about California. What about our plans? What about our dream of going backpacking in Europe?"  
  
"Mom, that was your dream. I just wanted to make you happy." Lorelai looked so hurt by this comment. She couldn't even say anything. "I'm sorry mom. I just can't think straight. I have to get there. I need to see him." Rory was on the brink of tears once more and felt horrible that she had made her mother upset as well.  
  
"OK. I know this is important to you. So go." Lorelai gave up. Rory jumped into her arms.  
  
"Mom, I didn't mean to hurt you. I just-"  
  
"I know baby." Lorelai interrupted her. "Now lets get home and get your stuff."  
  
******************************************  
  
Rory had boarded a plane to California at 5 PM. It would be nearly 8 PM California time when she got there. She would have to call Jess as soon as she landed. She watched a movie on the way. It was some kid movie so she didn't pay much attention to it. She fell asleep after a while and when she came to, she only had about 15 minutes left on the plane. She took a swig from her water bottle and began to mentally prepare herself for seeing Jess.  
  
She knew it wouldn't be the same as it was. They would have to start new and go slow. But she was ready. She just hoped he was.  
  
******************************************  
  
Jess was sitting on the couch watching news. He was bored out of his mind and decided to just go to sleep. He didn't sleep for long. He was soon shaken awake by the sound of the phone ringing. He was the only one at home. Sasha and Jimmy had gone to eat and Sasha's daughter was at a friends' house. He answered the phone gruffly.  
  
"Yea?"  
  
"I got your message." Said a sweet voice on the other end.  
  
"Rory! Hey. Isn't it kind of late there?"  
  
"No, it's only a little after 8." She said.  
  
"Rory, its 8 o'clock here which means its-"  
  
"Exactly. Its 8 o'clock here." She cut him off.  
  
"Rory. where are you?" The excitement was building in his chest.  
  
"I'm on the beach. I dunno exactly. this was the bus' last stop. There's a little bookstore right across the street though." She said.  
  
"Rory, are you in Venice?"  
  
"Yep." She said.  
  
"Tell me your not joking."  
  
"I'm not joking."  
  
"Are you just saying that because I told you to?"  
  
"Nope. I'm in Venice Beach, California."  
  
"What's the bookstore called?" Jess asked.  
  
"Uh. Literature Land." She said.  
  
"I'll be there in 5 minutes." He said.  
  
"OK." She said.  
  
"And Rory?"  
  
"Yea?"  
  
"I Love You." He said. They both hung up, the prospect of seeing each other was enthralling.  
  
******************************************  
  
Rory was perusing the bookstore, hoping to find something to give to Jess. But before she had any luck, he walked in the door. She smiled and walked over to him.  
  
When he saw her, his breath caught in his throat. He thought he had lost her forever, but here she was just a few feet away from him. He wanted to hug her, kiss her, he wanted to smell her hair and gaze into her eyes. But he also wanted to keep her this time. He never wanted to lose her again.  
  
Rory looked at Jess. He looked so different from just a week or two before. His eyes looked darker than usual and his face seemed dismal. But as soon as their eyes locked, his face lit up and his eyes became bright. He looked so gorgeous, his baggy pants and tight shirt flattered him and Rory wandered what he looked like underneath all that.  
  
They inched ever closer to one another. The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife. Neither wanted to say anything. They would have stayed like that forever but the door opened and someone asked if the would please move, as they were blocking her way.  
  
"Yea, sorry." Rory said. She and Jess moved aside. "So. hi."  
  
"Hey." He said. "We should probably go right? We can talk when we get to my place. its not far."  
  
"OK." She said. He took her bag from her hand and beckoned her to follow him.  
  
They finally reached the Mariano house. The dogs were barking as usual and Jess just steered Rory into the house. Once inside he took her into the living room and set her bag down on the floor. She looked him in the eyes and pulled out a book from her purse. It was his journal.  
  
"I read it. All of it. I had only read a few pages before but on the plane I read it all." She said. She handed him the book. "I thought about highlighting all the things you did wrong. all the times you lied to me. But then I thought about it. It didn't matter. But I did make a pro/con list in my head." She stopped, noting the look on his face. "Laugh if you must. But I realized the only thing on the pro list made it all worth it."  
  
"The only thing? Am I really that bad?" Jess asked.  
  
"No your not. That's just it. The thing on the pro list was you. Because. I like everything about you. So no matter what I could think of to put in the con column, it couldn't outweigh the pros."  
  
"Rory. If I had to make a pro/con list about you. there wouldn't be anything in the con column. That's why I always act so stupid around you. I'm always afraid I'm not good enough for you."  
  
"Jess. I missed you."  
  
"I missed you too."  
  
"Then why'd you leave in the first place?"  
  
"If you weren't going to forgive me. I didn't have much left in that town."  
  
"But you did! You had Luke, you had school, you had other friends."  
  
"None of that mattered to me anymore."  
  
"Luke didn't matter to you anymore? You know, he blames himself for you leaving. He thinks he wasn't good to you. He thinks that he failed you."  
  
"He does?" Jess suddenly felt incredibly guilty. Rory nodded. "But it wasn't his fault."  
  
"I told him that." She said.  
  
"How'd you know though?" He asked  
  
"I didn't. I just hoped that you didn't really feel that way. It would kill him."  
  
"So. how do I fix this?" he asked.  
  
"I don't know. That's something you have to figure out by yourself." She said.  
  
"OK."  
  
They both sat down on the couch. Rory grabbed his hand and squeezed it. She could tell he was lost. He felt bad about Luke. But mostly he felt bad about her and he didn't know how to fix it. So as he thought about everything that they had just said, Rory laid her head down on his shoulder. She absorbed his warmth that she had missed so much lately. Not long after that, she fell asleep.  
  
******************************************  
  
"Rory. wake up." She was shaken awake by Jess who had at some point last night moved her to a mattress and covered her up. "Rory. you have to get ready. I need to introduce you to my dad."  
  
Rory sleepily rubbed her eyes and stretched her arms above her head. She stood up and walked over to him. She kissed him quickly on the lips and leaned into his strong chest.  
  
"I've missed you a lot." She said. He pulled her closer and put his head on top of hers.  
  
"I think you mentioned that last night. But I missed you too." Jess said with a smirk.  
  
They stayed like that for a minute before Jess finally pulled away.  
  
"You should get ready. Showers down the hall, second door on the left. While you do that, I'm going to make us breakfast." Rory looked up at him.  
  
"Since when do you cook?" She asked.  
  
"Since I discovered Pillsbury and an oven."  
  
"Wow, the genius of it all." She said sarcastically  
  
"That's what I thought." He replied. "Now go on. must you torture me? You have to shower. I have to cook."  
  
"That's torture huh? Poor you."  
  
"I'll miss you." Jess said in a high-pitched voice.  
  
"I'll never let go Jack, I'll never let go." Rory said. She laughed, grabbed her bag, and headed off to the shower.  
  
******************************************  
  
So it seemed that everything was getting back on track. Rory didn't really want an apology. She knew Jess was sorry. She knew that he felt horrible about the things he did. That was enough for her. So she decided to be a little more open to him than she was the night before. She had even given him a kiss and she hadn't done that last night. But there was still a long way to go before they could be as close as they were before. But if they played their cards right, everything would be back to normal soon.  
  
Rory washed her vanilla-scented shampoo out of her hair and continued her normal shower routine. She shaved her legs, washed off with vanilla-scented body soap, and when she was finally done she just let the hot water fall on her face and back for a minute. She turned the water off and reached out for her towel. Wait. She hadn't gotten a towel. 'Oh great. wonderful.' She didn't know exactly what to do. She finally decided she would just have to call Jess.  
  
"Jess!" She waited a moment but there was no answer. "JESS!" she called out once more.  
  
"Rory? What's the matter?" Jess was standing outside the bathroom door now.  
  
"Um. I forgot to get a towel." She said finally.  
  
"Jeez you scared me. Hold on. the towels are in the closet out here." Jess went and retrieved a towel. He once again stood outside the bathroom door. "Um, Rory. do you want me to bring it in? Or should I leave it out here?" He asked nervously.  
  
"I guess just bring it in. and set it on the toilet." Rory stood at the back of the shower, trying to cover up a little. She shower curtain wasn't clear but if he looked hard he could probably see her. Jess opened the door. And quickly walked over and set the towel down. He left just as quickly and Rory yelled "Thanks!"  
  
"Oh yea. that wasn't awkward." Rory said to herself as she reached around the shower curtain to grab the towel.  
  
She dried off and got dressed. She wore a green tank top, shorts, and some green flip-flops. She let her wet hair hang down at first but decided just to pull it up. She brushed her teeth, put on some deodorant, and a little bit of lip gloss. Finally satisfied with her appearance she packed up her bag, hung her towel on a little hook and left the bathroom.  
  
She set her bag down in the living room before finally entering the kitchen. Jess had made cinnamon rolls and toast. He was already sitting at the table and drinking a glass of orange juice. Rory sat down next to him and said,  
  
"Wow, look at my little chef!"  
  
"I try." He said, avoiding her eyes.  
  
"Hey. um. sorry about the towel thing earlier. it didn't even occur to me while I was still fully clothed." She said.  
  
"Oh that's not a problem. it was just a little awkward." Jess said honestly.  
  
"Yea. I know what you mean. Maybe we can just like. forget about it?" She asked rather than stated. Jess laughed at her uncertainty.  
  
"I don't know why I feel awkward. I was the one with clothes on. I just didn't want you to feel weird about it."  
  
"Well. that's nice of you but I do feel kind of weird about it."  
  
"I'm sorry. I didn't want to make you feel weird."  
  
"No its not you, I just have this thing about like NOT wanting to be seen naked." She said, her face reddening more every second. "Lets eat. That looks really good."  
  
"OK. You want something to drink?" Jess asked her.  
  
"Got any."  
  
"Coffee it is." Rory smiled. He knew her too well. So they ate in near silence, Rory pausing only to look at Jess. She was glad she had come even if it was a little weird.  
  
******************************************  
  
(A/N) Ok that's it!! Next chapter- Rory meets Jimmy! REVIEW!!! 


	3. Meeting Jimmy and Skinny Dipping

(A/N) Here's ch.3. I hope you like this story. I am getting into it. These chapters are also longer than the chapters of my other fics so be grateful!! Lol  
  
****************************************** Last time:  
  
"Well. that's nice of you but I do feel kind of weird about it."  
  
"I'm sorry. I didn't want to make you feel weird."  
  
"No its not you, I just have this thing about like NOT wanting to be seen naked." She said, her face reddening more every second. "Lets eat. That looks really good."  
  
"OK. You want something to drink?" Jess asked her.  
  
"Got any."  
  
"Coffee it is." Rory smiled. He knew her too well. So they ate in near silence, Rory pausing only to look at Jess. She was glad she had come even if it was a little weird. ******************************************  
  
Chapter 3: Meeting Jimmy and Skinny Dipping.  
  
Jess and Rory were walking along the boardwalk. They talked about the things that had been going on with each other lately. There were still a lot of topics that needed to be covered but neither wanted to start a big conversation yet since they were currently on their way to see Jimmy.  
  
"Rory, you didn't tell me you were valedictorian! That's awesome." Jess said, squeezing her hand. "Did anyone take pictures?"  
  
"Yes! Oh it's a funny story! Sookie kept getting up and coming up to the front row during the ceremony! All the people sitting around her were so mad! But she took somewhere in the neighborhood of 500 pictures that night." She smiled.  
  
"I figured your mom would have been the one doing that." Jess said.  
  
"Oh no we did something else. While I was up getting my diploma we kept making these crazy faces. My grandparents went wild! Mom said they kept pestering her about it."  
  
"What do you mean crazy faces?" Jess asked. Rory quickly demonstrated before blushing and looking forward. "Oh, that kind of crazy face." They laughed.  
  
"Did I tell you they bought me a CAR!?" Rory practically yelled.  
  
"A car? Wow that's a pretty nice present." Jess said.  
  
"Yea it is. But I guess I will need one. getting to and from school."  
  
"Yea. You sure will." Jess said, trying to stay upbeat. Rory noticed his sudden mood change. She didn't know exactly what to say. But what came out was,  
  
"You know, you could always go back and take whatever courses you need. I could help you too." Jess wasn't smiling anymore.  
  
"That's OK Rory. I don't think I'm going back to school though."  
  
"Jess. if. oh never mind." Rory said, cutting herself off. She didn't particularly getting into this right now. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring it up."  
  
"Don't be sorry, it's not your fault. I just don't like to talk about it because some of the questions you were probably going to ask me, I don't have answers for."  
  
Rory stopped them both. She turned so they were facing one another. "You don't have to be afraid to talk to me. I'm not going to judge you. I just want to help."  
  
"Rory, maybe there's some things you cant help me with."  
  
"Well even if I can't help, I think you should at least tell me what's going on. That's what you do in relationships Jess." Rory said, trying to keep her temper. This was how he messed up last time. By insisting to keep everything to himself.  
  
"I know. It's just hard for me Rory. You're the first person in my life that has ever had any interest in really helping me. I'm just so used to keeping things to myself and working them out alone."  
  
"I don't think that's true Jess. I think maybe I'm just the first person who you want to help you. Maybe. other people have tried to help you. Maybe you blocked them out."  
  
Jess looked into Rory's eyes. "Maybe you're right." He nodded and Rory could tell he was hurting. "Maybe my life has gone the way it has because I never really loved anyone else before you."  
  
Rory could feel her eyes stinging and right there on the street she leaned towards Jess and shared a kiss filled with 2 weeks of longing, missing, and pain. This kiss was special. They could both feel the heat of each other's body, the passion that filled the other. This was the first time that Rory didn't want to break away sooner; she wanted it to keep going. She didn't care they were being watched by dozens of passerby's and were out in the open. She had never has a kiss quite like this. But Rory didn't have a choice but to break apart because right as the kiss began to deepen, her cell phone rang. She let out a small groan and pulled back from Jess. The moment was gone.  
  
"Hello?" Rory asked, very annoyed at whoever had decided to call her at this very second.  
  
"Rory, its me."  
  
"Hi mom. What's going on?"  
  
"Nothing sweetie. You just didn't call me last night so I was worried. Where are you?" Lorelai said.  
  
"Sorry. Yea everything is OK. Jess and I are on the boardwalk right now."  
  
"So you found him?" Lorelai asked, obviously worried.  
  
"Yea, last night." Rory answered.  
  
"Did you stay at his house?" Lorelai asked, sounding if possible more worried than she had before.  
  
"Yea, I slept on an extra mattress. Mom. everything is OK." Rory emphasized the word everything, hoping her mother would catch on.  
  
"So you didn't. do anything?"  
  
"Mom. No. I would tell you." Rory insisted,  
  
"OK well then I'm gonna let you go. Be a GOOD girl." Lorelai teased.  
  
"Shut up mom! OK, bye, love you!"  
  
"Love you too." Lorelai said as she hung up. Rory put her phone away, laughing.  
  
Jess gave her a quizzical look and she just said, "She's too paranoid."  
  
******************************************  
  
"Jess? Is it OK with your dad that I stayed here? Because if it's not then I have enough for a hotel." Rory asked nervously.  
  
"Ror, it was fine. He's pretty laid back. Just don't worry about it." Jess smiled at her and her worries lessened a little.  
  
"OK."  
  
Their hands had been linked since they left the house and had only become separated when Rory had to answer the phone. It was something they had missed so they were not willing to give up their hand holding just yet. But as they neared the little beach shack that held Jimmy's office, Rory could feel her anxiety creeping up. Her hands started to get sweaty. Jess tried to calm her but it wasn't helping much. Finally Jess said,  
  
"Rory. Chill. It's my dad. And all you have to do is say 'Hello, I'm Rory, nice to meet you.' Really now, what's the matter?" Rory didn't reply for a few moments but finally decided there was no point hiding it.  
  
"Jess, he comes home last night and sees your girlfriend asleep on a mattress. How is that supposed to look?" Jess just laughed at this comment.  
  
"I explained to him that you were tired, thus the sleeping. And he already knew about you, I've talked about you. So he basically knows what kind of person you are."  
  
"What kind of person am I?" Rory asked with a mischievous grin.  
  
"The smart kind." Rory's expression changed and she began to nod her head, thinking over every possible meaning of what Jess just said. She knew he meant it in a good way, but to any other person it could sound like an insult. After several minutes of silence, Rory decided she was over thinking the issue and just let it go. Jess noticed that Rory's eyes had unclouded and figured he should probably warn her that they were only about one hundred yards away from meeting Jimmy.  
  
"Rory? We're almost there."  
  
"Oh." She said.  
  
"Don't sound so excited, he might be frightened away by your cheerfulness." Jess said, in his ever-present sarcastic tone. Just then, a man stepped out of hot-dog stand and gave Jess a half wave. Jess waved back and had to drag Rory along until they were face to face with Jess' father.  
  
"Jimmy, this is my girlfriend, Rory." Jess said as he gave Rory a little shove so she was standing on an even plane with him.  
  
"Rory, nice to meet you." Jimmy said as reaching out to shake her hand.  
  
"Hi, nice to meet you. I'm sorry about just... showing up last night but I-"  
  
"It's not problem, don't worry about it. I'm just glad I get to meet you finally." Jimmy interrupted her.  
  
"So Jimmy, you want us to hang around for a while so you can show Rory around, or should we come back later?" Jess asked, seeing Rory fidget wasn't exactly his favorite sight.  
  
"You guys come in real quick, its only 11:30 so the lunch crowd won't be here for a bit." Jimmy lead them through the door and into his one room hot-dog stand. "This was originally built in the 50's you know Rory."  
  
"Oh really? That's interesting." Rory said, trying her best to sound perky.  
  
"But, uh... this is about it. You got the kitchen over here, well its not exactly a kitchen we just a have a grill and little condiment bar, but I guess it qualifies. I'm not really a kitchen expert or anything but-"  
  
"I would say it qualifies." Rory said. She was finally warming up to Jimmy and Jess was glad that she didn't feel TOO uncomfortable around him. So as Jimmy lead Rory around the small room Jess stood by the door. Just as Jimmy was going into his pickle jar speech, a customer came up and Jess escorted Rory out.  
  
"That wasn't so bad was it?" Jess asked her. She smiled and leaned closer to him.  
  
"The way Luke talked about him I thought he was going to be some kind of ex-convict running from the law while still managing to mess up everything in his path." Rory joked. "But really he seemed like a big kid. He was very excited about those pickles..." Rory continued.  
  
"Yea, I've had to sit through the pickle story about nine times." Jess said.  
  
"Aw, you poor baby."  
  
"Maybe you could kiss it and make it better?" Jess added in a baby voice.  
  
"Maybe I could." Rory said. She leaned forward and just as their lips were about to touch... "Or maybe I couldn't." She continued walking. Once she was about five feet ahead of him Jess too started to walk. He caught up to her and grabbed her hand once more.  
  
"You're gonna pay for that. You owe me big now." He said.  
  
"And what are you going to do about it mister?" Rory asked.  
  
"I'm going to give you your graduation present and then you'll feel so guilty that you'll repay me on your own." Jess said.  
  
"You got me a present?" Rory asked.  
  
"Maybe I did..."  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"And why would I tell you that?" Jess asked.  
  
"Because you looooove me. And because it's my present anyway and I'm going to know what it is as soon as you give it to me so why not just tell me now?" Rory added very matter-of-factly.  
  
"Well you got the first part right. I do 'looooove' you. But the second part, you are all wrong there. If I told you what it was, then how does it make it a present? It's supposed to be a surprise!"  
  
"What if I just repay what I owe you now?" She asked coyly.  
  
"OK." Jess said. They kissed quickly. Jess shook his head. "I'm still not telling you."  
  
"Jess... please?"  
  
"Nope."  
  
"Fine." Rory said, trying her hardest to frown. She wasn't doing a very good job seeing how Jess was staring at her and had a crazy grin on his face. She looked over at him and smiled shyly. "Pleeeease?"  
  
"No." Jess unlocked their hands and draped his arm over her shoulder. As he lead her back to the house, he couldn't help but get excited about what he was going to do tonight.  
  
******************************************  
  
Rory was in the bathroom getting ready. Jess had only given her a few instructions on how to dress. Comfortable but not casual. As if that was possible. Rory couldn't for the life of her figure out what Jess was planning. She decided if it couldn't be casual, then it must be someplace fancy. The comfortable part... that could either mean they were doing something else or that he just loved her so much to tell her she should be comfortable. 'Screw that. I'm going all out.' Rory thought. She dressed in a short blue dress, sandals, and let her hair hang down. She put on some eyeliner, which she didn't normally do. Her blue eyes popped out and matched the color of her dress exactly.  
  
She was finally pleased with her appearance and was ready to present herself to Jess. She walked out of the bathroom and down the hall to the living room. Jess was sitting on the couch dressed in slacks and a black polo shirt. It wasn't his style, but he wanted to look nice. She snuck up behind him and put her hands over his eyes.  
  
"Guess who." She said.  
  
"Rory, will you let go of my eyes so I can see you?" Jess asked playfully.  
  
"No. You wont tell me the plan so why should I let you see?"  
  
"Rory, I know it seems like you want to know. But really, you don't. You would be severely disappointed if you knew in advance."  
  
"Oh great. We're going to a sports bar aren't we?" Rory said sarcastically.  
  
"Damn, you guessed. Oh well, guess we wont go now that you know."  
  
"Jess!" Rory scolded him playfully.  
  
"If you uncover my eyes we can go. And there is no way I'm telling you the plan so don't even try." Rory took her hands away and Jess turned around. She walked around the couch and stood in front of him. He didn't say anything, he just stared. Rory took his silence for a negative response. She went to her bag and said,  
  
"I'll just change. I didn't know what to wear." Jess ran after her and grabbed her arm.  
  
"Drop the bag." He was smiling now. Rory placed her bag on the floor. "Now step away. This way." He pulled Rory by the hand down the hall and towards the front door. "Are you ready?" Jess asked as he pulled open the door.  
  
"Yea, I'm ready. Are you sure I look OK? I can still go change." Rory said, surveying herself, fiddling with the hem of her skirt.  
  
"You look unbelievably gorgeous."  
  
"Well that's always good to hear." Rory said.  
  
******************************************  
  
Jess and Rory idled along the boardwalk, hands intertwined as usual. The moon was out in its full glory and cast an iridescent light upon the pair. There was no use for conversation, the night was too beautiful. Each was consumed in their own thoughts. Jess looked over at Rory several times during their little walk, her face was bathed in moonlight and she looked so perfect. He stopped walking. She turned to see why he had stopped. She was about to speak but he placed a finger over his mouth.  
  
They stared into each others eyes as the waves crashed against the shore. Jess inched his face forward and cupped her cheek in his hand. Finally their lips touched and they moved into an embrace. Jess' hand moved to the small of her back and Rory ran one hand through Jess' hair. They finally separated and didn't even have to say anything. They could have stood their professing their love, telling each other they would never leave each other, but right now, nothing was for sure. They were in a crazy place, between reality and fantasy. Although they loved each other, they didn't know if it would be enough to get them through the trials that were most certainly ahead.  
  
******************************************  
  
Rory and Jess were sitting in a booth at a semi-fancy restaurant, ordering desert. Rory was concentrating on the menu, it all sounded so good. Chocolate cake, chocolate mousse, ice cream, and then she saw it. The coffee addicts cake. Made with coffee beans, chocolate, and some cream. Topped with coffee ice cream and chocolate syrup. What more could she possibly ask for? So the waiter came and Jess ordered chocolate cake and Rory ordered of course, The Coffee Addicts cake.  
  
"I figured you would order that. It sounds pretty good. Maybe we could share a little..." Jess said.  
  
"Yea right. I'm eating the whole thing. You might be able to have my crumbs." Rory said sarcastically.  
  
"Come on now Rory..." He pleaded, making his best puppy-dog face.  
  
"AH! Don't do the face. No no no no no." Rory said as she covered her face with her napkin. Jess got up and walked around to sit next to her. He pulled the napkin from her face and kissed her quickly.  
  
"Maybe we could just do that every time you take a bite..." They both smiled. When the waiter arrived a few minutes later, they did just that. Rory would take a small bite and Jess would kiss her. (A/N no tongue here ok ppl... he would get like food particles and crap in his mouth eww. No hes just getting the taste from her lips capiche?) They finally finished her cake and Jess hadnt even touched his. He was having too good of a time to worry about it. So they got a box for the cake.  
  
"Maybe we can eat that later tonite..." Rory hinted suggestively as they walked out of the restaurant. Jess raised his eyebrows at her, saying  
  
"Are you trying to seduce me Miss Gilmore?" She laughed.  
  
"Who knows... maybe I am." And with that they walked back to Jimmy and Sasha's house.  
  
******************************************  
  
They reached the gate to go in about 5 minutes later, everything was close by around here. Jess was about to open the door when Rory stopped him.  
  
"Rory... to go into the house it requires that I open the door."  
  
"Lets not go in yet. Lets do something crazy."  
  
"Crazy like skinny dipping in the ocean or crazy like go to the movies?" Jess asked.  
  
"Really crazy. Leave the cake, we're going to the beach." Rory had a wild look in her eyes.  
  
"You're joking right? You actually want to go skinny dipping in the ocean? I thought you had this 'thing about being seen naked by people'" Rory laughed.  
  
"Dont sound so surprised. But no. We won't be completely 'skinny'" She said. Jess put the cake down on the front porch and they headed toward the beach. Jess was eyeing Rory. Was she testing him? Was she serious? Why on earth did she want to go swimming at 11 o'clock at night?  
  
"So Rory... what brings on this sudden... spontanaity?"  
  
"I don't really know. But it just feels like... everything is so right. Nothing could change the way I'm feeling right now. I'm just taking advantage of it. Lets just have fun."  
  
"Alright then. Race you?" He asked.  
  
Rory took off running. "Sure!" she called out to a now running Jess. Rory beat him to the beach, but only by a few feet. They stopped dead and Rory threw off her shoes. "Come on. Strip!" She shouted. Jess removed his shirt and threw it to the ground. There were clothes flying everywhere, each trying to get undressed first. Rory won of course because she only had to take off one item, her dress. She she was already almost to the water when Jess finally sported only his boxers. They splashed into the water. Rory dove under and came up about 10 feet away, whipping her hair back. Jess swam out to her. They were about 25 feet from shore, they couldn't touch the bottom so they just treaded water and splashed each other.  
  
"This is fun. We should do it more often." Rory said thoughtfully.  
  
"No arguments here." Jess said. Rory swam slowly over to him, wrapping her arms around his neck when she finally reached him. She acted as though she was going to kiss him and just as their lips were about to touch, she dunked him underwater and swam away quickly. She knew Jess would retaliate. He sputtered to the surface again yelling "I am so gonna get you Rory."  
  
Rory was having trouble staying above water because she was laughing so hard. Jess' eyes were wide when he came up and she had obviously surprised him. He was swimming fast towards her, but Rory didn't want to be caught. She swam to the shore and began to run down the beach. Big mistake. Jess runs pretty dang fast. He caught up with her in mere seconds and tackled her to the ground. They were both laughing hysterically. They finally stopped and they both realized they were in a compromising position.  
  
Jess was lying directly on top of Rory with his hands around her. Jess inched his face closer, pulling his hand to her stomach... Thats about the time that the beach patrol found them. Apparently they didn't take kindly to crurfew breaking and demanded that they escort the teenagers home. Sure they were 18, but the officer just didn't seem to want them on the beach. So they went home, the officer following them the whole way.  
  
When they finally arrived, they went inside and sat in the kitchen. They were still wet from their beach endeavor. They sat in an uncomfortable silence. Finally Jess broke it.  
  
"I'm sorry." He said, avoiding her eyes.  
  
"For what? It wasn't your fault. God it was my fault. I was the one who wanted to do something crazy." Rory said sheepishly.  
  
"Yea, but I took advantage of it. I shouldn't have done that."  
  
"Jess you didn't do anything by yourself. It was mutual. We both wanted it." Rory said.  
  
"Rory, can I be straight with you?" Jess asked after a moment.  
  
"Yea." Their eyes locked.  
  
"Rory... I need to know how you feel about..."  
  
"I don't know what I want." She finished for him.  
  
"Because sometimes, I don't know how far to let myself go. And when I think its mutual... it's not. You'll stop. And thats fine. Don't get me wrong. I don't want to pressure you into doing something you don't want to but... you never give me any indication..."  
  
"Jess?" He looked up from the spot he had picked to stare at on the floor.  
  
"Yea?"  
  
"I think I need to go home."  
  
"What!? Why?" He asked, taken aback by her sudden change of heart.  
  
"And so do you. We're in a foreign place. We both belong back in Stars Hollow."  
  
"Rory, I can't go back there."  
  
"Yes you can." She said sincerely.  
  
"Rory, I... I just can't."  
  
"Why!? Because you're scared? Well heres a bit of a news flash for you. Life's scary." She yelled. "But if you want something bad enough, you just have to take the plunge. You have no reason why you can't go back. But if I'm not enough for you to take that plunge... then I have to go back without you."  
  
"Rory, you can't leave me." Jess pleaded.  
  
Rory had tears streaming down her face. "I don't want to leave you. But I will if I have to. I have to know what you're in this for. I have to know if you love me enough."  
  
"I do love you Rory." Jess said, obviously upset.  
  
"Then we are going home tomorrow. Pack your stuff up. I'm leaving here tomorow at 8. Goodnight. And if you aren't coming with me... Then I guess this is goodbye." She said sadly before turning to go to bed.  
  
****************************************** (A/N) So ends the long awaited chapter 3. Sorry it took so long, I just had trouble writing the last part. So is there really trouble in paradise? or will they live happily ever after? I'm wrapping this up in the next 2 chapters so please review and tell me what you think! much love to my sisters kelly and vicky! MuAh! and thanks SO much to my reviewers!! Until next chapter... *AmSam Malfoy. PS- My birthday is this friday! (aug.8!) :-D 


	4. Mourning the Loss of 1000 Gummi Bears

(A/N) Here is chapter 4. Can anyone guess what's going to happen? This chapter is probably going to be a little shorter than the last one because man, that was long. And it took me forever to think up all that stuff lmao. Ok so here it is! ~AmSam Malfoy~  
  
******************************************  
Last time:  
  
"Rory, you can't leave me." Jess pleaded.  
  
Rory had tears streaming down her face. "I don't want to leave you. But I will if I have to. I have to know what you're in this for. I have to know if you love me enough."  
  
"I do love you Rory." Jess said, obviously upset.  
  
"Then we are going home tomorrow. Pack you're stuff up. I'm leaving here tomorrow at 8. Goodnight. And if you aren't coming with me... Then I guess this is goodbye." She said sadly before turning to go to bed.  
  
******************************************  
  
Chapter 4: We Mourn the Loss of 1000 Gummi Bears  
  
Rory awoke the next morning to the sound of her miniature alarm clock at 6:30 AM. She took a shower, dressed and finished packing her bags. She decided to leave a quick note to Jimmy.  
  
'Dear Jimmy and Sasha,  
  
Thank you so much for your hospitality. I appreciate it so much. Unfortunately I have to leave to go home and I'm sorry I didn't get to say goodbye before I left. OK, well once again, thank you!  
  
Sincerely, Rory Gilmore'  
  
She left this on the breakfast table. She set her bags down by the door. She didn't want to look for Jess. He needed to come on his own. So she waited at the door. But was 7:58 rolled around, she was beginning to think that he wasn't coming. At 8, he still wasn't there. She couldn't leave. She knew she should but she couldn't bring herself to it without at least seeing him one more time. She tiptoed to his room and opened the door just enough to see his empty bed. He was gone.  
  
******************************************  
  
Rory cried the whole way to the airport. He was gone. Gone. She had given him options and he had chosen to leave her. She couldn't believe she had almost... She would have given him anything. But he threw it all away.  
  
Her cab pulled up at about 8:25 to the airport and she went inside. She miraculously caught a 9 o'clock flight to Hartford. She boarded. She slept. She made the meticulous trip back home to face life without Jess. She let her mind wander but didn't like the place it took her. She was sitting there imagining all possible reasons for Jess not to have been there. She could only think of bad things. 'He never really loved me.' She didn't want this to be true.  
  
She studied the people on board this boring plane with her. Most people seemed plain enough, of course there were a few exceptions. One woman with extraordinarily large hair, a balding man who was tinkering with a laptop, and a girl who appeared to be about Rory's age who, like Rory, was crying. She wondered what the girl was crying about. Probably something more significant than a boy. Maybe her grandfather had died. Maybe she didn't get accepted into her college. Or just maybe, she was crying because she too, had just lost the love of her life. Of course, Rory would never know because the girl went to the bathroom and just a few minutes later they landed.  
  
But just knowing that maybe... maybe she wasn't alone... made Rory feel somewhat better.  
  
******************************************  
  
"Mom, it's me." She spoke into her cell phone.  
  
"Rory! Hey how are you doing?"  
  
"Badly. Can you come and pick me up? I'm in Hartford..." Rory said dismally.  
  
"Oh hun... Yea I'll be there in half an hour." She said empathetically.  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"You're welcome. OK I'm gonna go..."  
  
"Mom... I love you."  
  
"I love you too hun."  
  
They hung up. Rory walked around the terminal, stopping to look in bookstores. She went into a candy store and bought a pound of gummi bears. By the time Lorelai arrived there were about 10 left. Lorelai walked up to her daughter seeing the bag of nearly empty gummi bears.  
  
"How many bears have you eaten?" She asked.  
  
"About a thousand. I bought a pound. And now... I don't feel too good."  
  
"Well I wouldn't think the bears are feeling too hot right now either." Rory smiled meekly at her mothers' humor, but couldn't bring herself to laugh. "So... what happened?"  
  
"I went crazy. He tried to do what I've been telling him to do. He was trying to talk to me. And I freaked and... I told him that I needed to come home. And if he didn't come with me that it was over."  
  
"Rory... is that what you want? Do you want it to be over with him?"  
  
"No." Rory broke down. "I love him. I just want to make everyone happy. I needed you to..."  
  
"Rory, you have to just... forget about me for once. Do what you want. Don't worry about what everyone thinks or says. It's not fair of anyone to make you feel like that. Just... follow your heart." Rory was sobbing and heavily embraced her mother.  
  
"Mom, I'm just so scared that I'll... make the wrong decision. I don't want to disappoint you." Lorelai shook her head.  
  
"Rory, you could never disappoint me. And sometimes... the wrong decisions are what make life interesting. You can't be afraid of being wrong or you may never be right."  
  
"So how can I fix this again?" Rory asked.  
  
"Well, we're gonna need a pretty big toolbox."  
  
******************************************  
  
Rory was signing online. First step, apology. It was lame to do it online, but Jess hadn't been answering the phone and when Rory did finally get through Sasha had picked up.  
  
"He says he's not here doll." She had said, rather annoyed with Jess.  
  
"What...? So he really is there he just told you to tell me that he wasn't there?" Rory inquired.  
  
"Exactly."  
  
"Oh... OK well thank you..."  
  
"No problem." She turned around to see Jess on the couch, before whispering, "Hey, give it time, he'll come around."  
  
"I don't know that he ever will." Rory said sadly. Sasha just sighed. "I have to go. if he asks. just tell him I'm trying to say I'm sorry." She hung up the phone and sat numbly on her bed.  
  
Rory decided that it was probably time to go to Phase 2: Groveling.  
  
Back in California, Sasha walks in to the living room, where Jess is sitting on the couch watching the news.  
  
"You need to talk to her." She said sitting down next to him, taking the remote from his hands.  
  
"It's not that simple. All I tried to do was talk to her before. She always tells me that we should talk about things. So I finally did and she just. she."  
  
"She's called 4 times in the last 12 hours. She's just trying to tell you that she's sorry."  
  
"And how would you know that? Are you suddenly inhabited by her mind?" Jess asked mockingly.  
  
"Because she just told me so you little shit. So lose the attitude." Jess looked stunned. Usually Sasha was laid back and apathetic. Her sudden change in demeanor was surprising to say the least. After he got over the initial shock of her outburst though, he realized what she had said. Rory was trying to apologize. He wanted to talk to her so badly, to hear the sound of her voice. But. Jess went over every excuse in his head. Each sounded completely logical, but somehow fell short of making him call her.  
  
******************************************  
  
"Ror, maybe. maybe he just won't talk. I think you'll have to communicate in other ways." Lorelai said, taking a sip of her giant coffee mug.  
  
"Like what? Send him flowers?" The sarcasm in her voice was completely missed by Lorelai whose eyes widened.  
  
"Exactly! Send him flowers. It will get him thinking about you even more and will probably make him laugh and then he'll have no choice but to call you!"  
  
"Of course he'll have a choice. He could just throw away the flowers and not call me." She said.  
  
"But he won't."  
  
"And why won't he?" Rory asked.  
  
"Because he still loves you."  
  
"If he loves me so damn much then why hasn't he answered my calls or emails? How come he told Sasha to tell me he wasn't there when I finally did get through? He was sitting right next to the phone I know he wasn't gone. But he won't let me in. And it's all my fault." She ranted until she was out of breath.  
  
"Whoa, calm it down. Lets take a chill shot."  
  
"Its chill pill mother. Pill."  
  
"No, they no longer come in pill form, it is now a shot." Rory rolled her eyes at the things her mother found humorous.  
  
"Ok, I've taken a chill shot."  
  
"Good, because when you are all worked up like that, it makes mommy crazy too."  
  
"We are so weird."  
  
"No everyone else in the world is weird. We my girl, are the dictionary's definition of 'normal'."  
  
"Ok, we're normal. So, as a normal person, should I send him flowers?" Rory asked trying very hard to fight the laughter that so obviously needed to accompany that statement.  
  
"Yes. Send. daisies."  
  
"Why daisies?"  
  
"Why are you still questioning me?"  
  
"Sending daisies."  
  
"Good girl."  
  
Rory just shook her head before picking up the phone. She called one of those delivery services. They sent a dozen daisies to Jess with a card attached which read 'Please call me. I love you. -Rory'. Rory was strangely satisfied that she had done this. At least he would see that she still loved him. She just hoped it would work.  
  
******************************************  
  
"I have a delivery for Jess Mariano." The man said, holding a bouquet of flowers.  
  
"Uh. OK." Jimmy said as he took the flowers the man handed over. "Am I supposed to like. sign something?"  
  
"Yes sir, could you sign on the dotted line please?" He shoved a clipboard in Jimmy's face.  
  
"Sure." He signed his name and the delivery guy left. When he closed the door he went to the living room. "Hey Jess, flowers."  
  
Jess looked at him like he was crazy. "I see there are flowers."  
  
"They're for you."  
  
"What?"  
  
"That's what I thought. But look there's a card and everything." He picked up the card from the clip that attached it to the flowers. "It says, 'Please ball me, I lug you. -Roarie'. What in the hell."  
  
"Let me see that." Jess said, snatching the note from Jimmy. He read it over. Finally he laughed. "Well it's from Rory obviously. But the rest is very. cryptic." Jess kept eyeing the card, trying to decipher its meaning. 'Please ball me.' Was that supposed to mean. no she would never say that. HA. 'I lug you.' That was just downright strange. He decided to email her. ******************************************  
  
From: TheJstr@yahoo.com To: ilovecoffee@hotmail.com Subject: Flowers.  
  
Hey Rory. I got the flowers today. Um yea, that was interesting. What's up with the card? It's kind of confusing.  
  
I guess I'm gonna go. -Jess  
  
******************************************  
  
He almost ended it with 'Love, Jess' but decided against it. He held his breath as he hit the 'Send' button. He and Rory hadn't spoken since the night before she left. Not that she hadn't tried. Maybe he had worded it too harshly. It was too late now though. All he could do was wait.  
  
******************************************  
  
"Mom! Come read this!" Rory shouted, having received Jess' email.  
  
"What. Are. You. Screaming. About!?" Lorelai asked. She had been woken from her power nap by Rory yelling.  
  
"Jess emailed me."  
  
"Oh. Move over, let momma see." She booted Rory out of the chair. "What's that supposed to mean? 'Its kind of confusing.' What did you say? Was it in Chinese? 'Cuz you know, that would make it kind of confusing."  
  
"I said, 'Please call me, I love you.'"  
  
"Wow, I thought you said he was smart."  
  
"I don't understand. How could he not get that?"  
  
"Maybe you should ask him."  
  
"How? He won't answer my calls. Flowers are definitely out. Email is so lame."  
  
"LUKE!" Rory turned around, thinking Luke must be there. But when he was nowhere in sight she turned back to face her mother.  
  
"Mom. I think maybe YOU should take a chill shot." Lorelai shook her head.  
  
"No, no, no child. We use Luke to get to Jess. He calls him about something. and when Jess is on the phone he puts you on."  
  
"What if he hangs up on me?"  
  
"He won't."  
  
"And why not?"  
  
"Because he loves you."  
  
"That sounds strangely familiar." But Lorelai didn't pay attention; she was already pulling on her shoes. She grabbed Rory's hand and they made their way to Luke's Diner.  
  
******************************************  
  
"LUKE! We need mondo coffee and a mondo favor!"  
  
"Lorelai, can't you ever come in quietly?" Luke asked as he poured two mugs of very strong coffee.  
  
"Of course we can't, the Gilmore's have to make good entries." Rory said, taking a gulp of her coffee.  
  
"So you got your coffee, what might I ask is this 'mondo favor'?" Luke asked.  
  
"Well you see Luke, since you love us so much, you are going to be our pawn." Lorelai said grinning.  
  
"No." Luke answered. He turned around to head for the kitchen.  
  
"But it's for Rory!" Lorelai screeched. Luke stopped and turned around.  
  
"Give him the puppy eyes baby." Lorelai prodded Rory. She gave Luke the cute eyes and puffed out her bottom lip.  
  
"I'm listening." He said finally. Rory smiled again and Lorelai continued to divulge the plan. After Luke took it all in, he nodded.  
  
"So I just call him and then say something like 'Oh wait a sec.' and hand the phone over to Rory?"  
  
"Exactly." Rory said while Lorelai nodded eagerly.  
  
"We are good plan makers. We could take over the world and make all the rivers run with coffee instead of water. How exciting!!"  
  
"Chill shot, mom."  
  
"Oh yea. Calming down." But she still laughed giddily as Luke began to dial Jess' number in California.  
  
"Hey Jess, it's Luke." He waited while Jess spoke on the other end. "Uh huh yea I was just gonna ask you. Ah, wait just a second. Yea hold on." He put his hand over the receiver and beckoned Rory over.  
  
"Hi Jess." Rory said tentatively.  
  
"Rory. You uh. Hi. I'm confused. Wasn't I just talking to Luke?"  
  
"Yea, he's our pawn."  
  
"OK."  
  
"I got your email."  
  
"Oh yea. I uh."  
  
"What didn't you understand? I thought I made everything pretty clear. And still no call, no letter, no fruit basket, and no smoke signal. That's what you said huh?" Rory said, anger rising up in her.  
  
"Rory, I had no idea what that meant."  
  
"You don't understand the words 'I love you'? I thought at least 'Please call me' was in your vocabulary range." Jess just started laughing hysterically. Rory was on the verge of tears. "What is your problem?" The people in Luke's were starting to stare.  
  
"Oh Rory. There must have been some kind of mistake. The letter I got didn't say anything like that!"  
  
"Well what did it say then?" She asked.  
  
"It said. 'Please ball me. I lug you. Roarie, spelled R-O-A-R-I-E." He continued to laugh the entire time he said this and afterwards as well.  
  
"Oh. I guess that would be kind of." But she didn't finish her sentence because she too started to laugh.  
  
"Rory. what's so funny? Clue me in!!" Lorelai asked impatiently.  
  
"Jess. I'm so sorry. I. I just." She saw Lorelai eyeing her, awaiting her words. "Hey can I call you back, I'm standing in the diner and my mom is breathing down my neck."  
  
"Yea. Whatever." Jess said, mood changing.  
  
"I'm sorry. Please just hold on OK? I'll call you back in just a second."  
  
"I dunno Rory."  
  
"Jess please."  
  
"I'll talk to you in a minute."  
  
"Thank you." They hung up. Rory walked over to her mother. "Details later. I have to talk to him first though."  
  
"Fine. I see how it is, freeze me out!"  
  
"Oh please, you will so be over it when I pour you another cup of coffee." She picked up the pot and poured it up to the brim of her mothers' mug.  
  
"OK. But make it snappy!" She said taking a sip.  
  
"Luke!" She called into the kitchen. He poked his head out. "Can I go upstairs?" Luke nodded and she turned and almost ran up the stairs. She reached the top and opened the door to the apartment. She pulled out her cell phone and dialed Jess' number. He picked up after a couple of rings.  
  
"Hey."  
  
"Hi."  
  
"So uh."  
  
"Yea."  
  
"We are the King and Queen of monosyllaby." Rory said.  
  
"I don't think that's a word."  
  
"Well, you know what I mean."  
  
"Rory, why did you leave?"  
  
Rory froze. She didn't know how to answer. But finally decided that honesty was the only way to go here. "I was scared."  
  
"Of what?"  
  
"Of you. I was scared that I might give into something that. I want but I'm not sure if I'm ready yet."  
  
"I'm not trying to pressure you Rory. I just, I didn't know how you felt about it."  
  
"I know. You didn't do anything wrong. I ran away."  
  
"I wish you hadn't."  
  
"Me too."  
  
"I'm pretty dumb you know? I kept avoiding you. I missed you like crazy, I would dream about you. but I wouldn't let myself be near you. I kept trying to tell myself that that's what I had to do to fix it."  
  
"No of course not. But ya know, I didn't do such a great job of that either." Jess laughed.  
  
"Now that we have trashed ourselves and we both know how we are complete idiots, how about we just forgive and forget."  
  
"I would very much so like that." Rory said. "The only thing that would make it better was if you were here so I could kiss you."  
  
"Don't tease me with such thoughts." They laughed. Rory walked over and layed down on Jess' bed.  
  
"You're bed is very comfortable." She said.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Your bed at Luke's, its really comfortable." Jess raised his eyebrows.  
  
"You're laying in my bed?"  
  
"Maybe."  
  
"That's kind of a turn on." Rory laughed.  
  
"Oh really?"  
  
"Big time."  
  
"Well it is for me too." She said. She hugged his pillow close to her. It smelled like him. This was second best to actually being next to him.  
  
"You are such a tease." Jess said, thinking about Rory, lying in his bed. If only he was too.  
  
"Yea well, I do try." Rory just wished and wished that Jess could be here, lying next to her. "I want you Jess." This had come out in a huskier voice that she anticipated.  
  
"Whoa. Rory."  
  
"That came out wrong. I meant, I want you here. with me. ok umm."  
  
"Its ok Rory, I know what you mean."  
  
"Come home. And then we can lie here together instead of having to talk to each other on the phone, just wishing for it."  
  
"I don't belong there." Jess said.  
  
"Who says so? I think this is exactly where you belong, surrounded by the people you love and who love you back."  
  
"OK. I'll come home."  
  
"Jess really, come on, you cant stay in California forever!" Rory said.  
  
"Rory, I just said that I was going to come home."  
  
"Oh. Right. My bad." He laughed at her persistence, he admired it so much.  
  
"I'll be on a plane and back home in 6 hours."  
  
"I don't want to wait that long."  
  
"Well I can't get there any faster!" He said jokingly.  
  
"I know. I just want you here now." There was longing in her voice.  
  
"I am going to pack now. I'll call you when I get back."  
  
"How about I pick you up." She suggested.  
  
"If you want to."  
  
"Oh trust me I do. 6 hours?"  
  
"Yep."  
  
"OK then. I Love you." Rory lost her breath when he said these words. He did still love her.  
  
"I love you too." She said softly as she hung up. Only six hours until she could see Jess once again. Only six hours until she could feel the warmth of his body against hers again. Just an hour before, she thought she might never see him again. But now she was going to pick him up from the airport in just a few more hours. But for now, she would just stay in his bed, taking in his scent, taking in the comfort of that fact that he had inhabited this bed, that he had dreamed about her in it. So this is what love really felt like.  
  
******************************************  
  
(A/N) The end of ch. 4! So much for it being shorter that the last chapter. Its less words but more pages I think. I think ch. 5 is going to be the last chapter! Expect it at the end of this week, hopefully. Sorry if I stole anyone's emails there. and once again a reminder that I own NOTHING! I start school on Monday, Joy. Yea right. Alright so REVIEW! And thanks sooo much to everyone who has reviewed so far! Hope you liked! And I am OFFICIALLY 15 NOW! Yes :-D ~AmSam Malfoy~ 


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